On Scientology: "Yes Mr. Cruise, I'll take the 1 billion year membership. Do your facilities include a sauna?"
On Mommy Dearest: "NOOOOO! NOOOO WIRE HANGERS EVEEEEERRRRRRR, ORIONNNN!"
On mayonnaise: "I love Paula Deen."
He probably doesn't mind that I swiped these profile photos of him from Facebook and quoted his original captions, right?
I mean, probably not.
Happy birthday, boyo!
LOVE! AT YOU!