A lot has been rolling through my head so far this year.
And since we're being candid here, that ball started rolling long before 2013 flipped onto the calendar. And even before I read Elise's post on One Little Word (and subsequently read about the concept here).
The project is defined like this:
"Essentially the idea is to choose a word (or let it choose you) that has the potential to make an impact on your life."
"Or let it choose you."
What an amazing and humbling way to think about this. And oddly enough, that's exactly what happened.
Love chose me long before this project came to me. When so much of my world fell apart almost two years ago, love was the last thing I expected to hold on to. But no matter what happened, I couldn't shake it. Love had a firm hold on me and wasn't about to loosen its grip.
And I am so thankful it didn't.
Because love came to define the way I wanted to live my life. It lit me up inside and filled me to the brim, to the point that all I wanted to do then was pour it out all over the world around me.
But I had some work to do first. A lot of work.
So God set up a new plan (new to me anyway) and a whole new game plan was laid before me. He started chipping away at that part of me I was still withholding and I finally heard the trumpet that brought the final wall around my heart for Him crashing down.
And then some really amazing things started happening. More and more, He revealed His heart to me and I began to crave Him - not just need Him - wholly and earnestly for the first time in my life.
2012 was a big year for that.
People all around me talk about what they're meant to do, what their purpose is, what their calling in life is. And more and more, I feel that call in my own life is this:
So I made a new kind of resolution this year.
My one little word for 2013 is LOVE.
In 2013, I want to love like He does. I want my heart to align with His, reaching for the people who think they deserve it least. I want my heart to break for what breaks His. I want to love like crazy.
(read Love Does to get a better idea of what I'm going for here, haha)
I resolve to delve deeper into His word and His heart than I ever have and get closer to Him.
I resolve to take my hands off the wheel and let Him point me where I need to go.
I resolve to love like He does.
Without fear and without conditions.
What sealed this deal was something Frankie said to me on New Year's Eve. There's something about our friendship I've never been able to put my finger on, but somehow he always, always knows when something is on my mind. He reads me when I think no one can (and usually reassures me before I even know I need it).
So on December 31st, when my mind - like my heart, so prone to wandering from the comfort in His peace - was drifting, Frankie caught me.
"You will have your happy ending. You will. Because you believe in love."
Now I managed to fight off tears, but even if I hadn't, they would not have been tears of sadness.
Quite the contrary.
Because even though it may sound silly, it felt kind of like someone speaking a prophecy over my year.
So 2013 - brace yourself...
I'm gonna love on you so hard.