how did natural selection miss this one?


Ladies & gentlemen, for your daily ego boost, I bring you 

"The Idiot Call Of The Day"

-

::ring, ring::

Me: Hello, thank you for calling, how may I help you?

Darwin's Nightmare Of A Human Being: Yeah, hi, I just have a few questions about your 2010 Oregon Pinot Gris?

(yes, a question mark, her voice went up at the end)

Me: Sure, what can I help you with?

Darwin Girl: So first of all, what varietal is it?

Me: ........

Darwin Girl: .......

Me: It's pinot gris.

Darwin Girl: (with absolutely no sense of shame) OK great and where was that grown?

Me: ......

Darwin Girl: (presumably places the metal helmet back on the monkey she borrowed it from and flips the switch)

Me: Oregon.

Darwin Girl: Awesome. And then what's the alcohol content on that?

Me: (smashes bottle of 2010 Oregon Pinot Gris against forehead) 13%.

Darwin Girl: .........

Me: Is there anything else I can help you with?

Darwin Girl: Nope, that was all I needed! Thank you!

::hangs up::

Me: Sometimes I hate everyone.

-

*I didn't actually smash a bottle into my head - I just wish I had*

4 comments:

  1. fucking awesome

    ReplyDelete
  2. Natural selection has missed too many. It would've been even funnier if it had been a face to face interaction. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. YOU DIDN'T RECOGNIZE MY VOICE?!?!

    J/k I never question my alcohol. Silly lady.

    ReplyDelete

 

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